It seems like it was ages ago since my last weight update, I just didn't feel right, felt down most of the time but the only thing that kept me going was my exercise routine and treadmill.
In fact when I was running on my treadmill whilst listening to music made me feel slightly happy and complete, this is where I have tried to release all my negative thoughts and stress, that's what I needed at that time.
Even being very upset and not myself didn't mean that I would start binge eating again, I wanted to come out better from my rough patch, I wanted to carry on doing what makes me feel good and proud of myself. It seems very weird how you can turn stress into a positive thing, but I did it!
I'm still eating clean, introducing more veg into my diet and cutting out bread, pasta, cous cous, sweets, fizzy drink and processed meats. I don't feel like I'm depriving myself or my body form things, eating healthier only helps me to achieve my goals and oh boy I want to be stronger and fitter!
Few weeks ago I came across one of the training programms by following which you are meant to lose weight and to gain lean muscle. I don't normally invest into something I'm not sure of but seeing before and after pictures make me wonder what if it's me, believe it or not- I have never seen my body without fat!!
So I have bought Phase 1 and have started following exercise routine with some alterations i.e. cutting on rest days and adding running on a treadmill when I can. I can see results on the mirror, I can see my weight going down slowly but it's hard to say what pushes this diet or exercising, I assume a combination of both.
Today I am not really happy about my results, it feels like I constantly have a battle with myself, one minute I like what I see, but because I am much thinner in my head than in real life it feels much harder to accept that real results are very slow. Whilst exercising I decided "to admire" my body one more time as I stripped to bra and leggings and was shocked how much sagginess my tummy has, this is something I didn't expect to see and it made me think that I need to push myself even harder. But saying and doing are 2 different things, all I can do is try!
It sounds to me like you're doing amazingly well. It takes a lot to push through the stress and stay on track when it would be much easier to give into temptation and stress eat. Also, you took the initiative to purchase the new training programme. One day at a time but well done on your journey so far xxx
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